A Mouthful of Fun!

So, I am sitting here at the university coffee shop with my new prescription for antibiotics in my hand because I have a new and improved infection in my gums. I guess I have put off the dentist too long, and finally it has caught up to me. When the nurse practitioner asked me "when was the last time you went to the dentist?" I honestly didn't know the answer to that question. Part of it is because I hate the dentist. I use the word hate intentionally here.

Flashback to my last dentist experience. It was when I was still in Minnesota, and I was eating Chinese Food, and my wisdom tooth broke. Why I didn't get them pulled in the first place leads me right back to square one of fear of the dentist. Nevertheless, my tooth broke, and I had to go to the dentist because I was in such excruciating pain. When I got to the dentist, the idea was to pull the tooth out. I then endured the needle in my mouth, and slowly my tooth got pulled out. in the mean time, I am going into a hyper-anxiety attack and before they can pull the tooth out, the last words I hear is..."James, I need you to relax...James...try to relax...take a deep breath James...oh, he passed out.." Yes, right there on the dentist bed, I passed out.

So, now, I have to head back to the dentist again, I need a lot of work done. Just the idea of it makes me sweat, and weak to my knees. But, this time I am a different man. A man with a new years resolution that includes "take better care of myself". With a somewhat forced sense of confidence, I guess I am heading to the dentist with a little more support, from all the little voices in my head. I couldn't help but think, do people ever get over their fears? Does the result justify the mean? For too long, I left the result of good health go for the fear of the dentist, and where did that get me? No where. I am kicking myself in the butt right now wishing I was a little smarter, but I guess these are some lessons I need to learn in life. Health is such a fragile but beautiful privilege in life. You don't have the right to be healthy if you don't take care of yourself, and I learned my lesson the hard way. Somethings happen without reason, but most things happen with a reason. I guess the laws of physics work for everything after all.

I guess after all said and done, it's not what you do it life, it's how you do it in life. So often I am humbled with my experiences and life keeps giving me small hints to let me know that there are so many things that make this beautiful, and yet so challenging. Who ever said life was a game anyway? Life isn't a game, in a game, there are winners and losers. And I can't imagine a life with an outcome with a loss. I'd like to think of life as more like a coloring book. Who cares if you color well or not, or stay in the lines. The important part is you keep coloring and keep turning the pages. So, all this thought because of some bad teeth...I guess I needed something to sink my teeth into something, and maybe even chew on some thoughts for a little bit...after all, Jello isn't all that filling for the mind anyway...